A Prayer for Owen Meany by John Irving

At the beginning of the book, Owen Meany is a child, who yells everything he says because his vocal chords never fully developed. He is also so small that his peers pass him around the room over their heads during Sunday School.


A Prayer for Owen Meany was touching, entertaining, thought provoking, heart wrenching, disgusting, frustrating, enlightening, and an overall good read. Did I LOVE the book? No, not really. There were things about it that I almost hated, but I loved Owen Meany. The story is narrated by Owen Meany’s best childhood friend John. The thing about this book which frustrated me the most was that John—in present day, telling the story—was dreadfully annoying. The book basically came in 30—or so—page segments of great stories, separated by irritating rants about newspapers and the US sucking. I’m not defensive about the US or anything, but John’s incessant and repetitive whining just got really old. The good news is that the portions of the book where John is a whiny adult are typically very short—about 3-5 pages.

The target audience for this book is probably those who were in their late teens or 20s during the Vietnam War. Anyone can enjoy and appreciate the book, but I think it would have greater meaning and resonate more with people of that generation.

Favorite passages:

“JUST BECAUSE A BUNCH OF ATHEISTS ARE BETTER WRITERS THAN THE GUYS WHO WROTE THE BIBLE DOESN’T NECESSARILY MAKE THEM RIGHT!” he said crossly. “LOOK AT THOSE WEIRDO TV MIRACLE-WORKERS—THEY’RE TRYING TO GET PEOPLE TO BELIEVE IN MAGIC! BUT THE REAL MIRACLES AREN’T ANYTHING YOU CAN SEE—THEY’RE THINGS YOU HAVE TO BELIEVE WITHOUT SEEING. IF SOME PREACHER’S AN ASSHOLE, THAT’S NOT PROOF THAT GOD DOESN’T EXIST!” “Yes, but let’s not say ‘asshole’ in class, Owen,” Pastor Merrill said. And in our Scripture class, Owen said, “IT’S TRUE THAT THE DISCIPLES’ ARE STUPID—THEY NEVER UNDERSTAND WHAT JESUS MEANS, THEY’RE A BUNCH OF BUNGLERS, THEY DON’T BELIEVE IN GOD AS MUCH AS THEY WANT TO BELIEVE, AND THEY EVEN BETRAY JESUS. THE POINT IS, GOD DOESN’T LOVE US BECAUSE WE’RE SMART OR BECAUSE WE’RE GOOD. WE’RE STUPID AND WE’RE BAD AND GOD LOVES US ANYWAY—JESUS ALREADY TOLD THE DUMB-SHIT DISCIPLES WHAT WAS GOING TO HAPPEN.” Pg 309

“Why does she drink so much?” I asked Owen. “HESTER’S AHEAD OF HER TIME,” he said. “What’s that mean?” I asked him. “Do we have a generation of drunks to look forward to?” “WE HAVE A GENERATION OF PEOPLE WHO ARE ANGRY TO LOOK FORWARD TO,” Owen said. “AND MAYBE TWO GENERATIONS OF PEOPLE WHO DON’T GIVE A SHIT,” he added.” Pg 362

“what could Marilyn Monroe’s death ever have to do with me? “IT HAS TO DO WITH ALL OF US,” said Owen Meany, when I called him that night. “SHE WAS JUST LIKE OUR WHOLE COUNTRY—NOT QUITE YOUNG ANYMORE, BUT NOT OLD EITHER; A LITTLE BREATHLESS, VERY BEAUTIFUL, MAYBE A LITTLE STUPID, MAYBE A LOT SMARTER THAN SHE SEEMED. AND SHE WAS LOOKING FOR SOMETHING—I THINK SHE WANTED TO BE GOOD. LOOK AT THE MEN IN HER LIFE—JOE DIMAGGIO, ARTHUR MILLER, MAYBE THE KENNEDYS. LOOK AT HOW GOOD THEY SEEM! LOOK AT HOW DESIRABLE SHE WAS! THAT’S WHAT SHE WAS: SHE WAS DESIRABLE. SHE WAS FUNNY AND SEXY—AND SHE WAS VULNERABLE TOO. SHE WAS NEVER QUITE HAPPY, SHE WAS ALWAYS A LITTLE OVERWEIGHT. SHE WAS JUST LIKE OUR WHOLE COUNTRY.” Pg 430

“THE ONLY WAY YOU CAN GET AMERICANS TO NOTICE ANYTHING IT TO TAX THEM OR DRAFT THEM OR KILL THEM,” Owen said.” Pg 431

If this were a movie, I’d rate it: PG-13

Overall Grade: B+

Would I recommend this to my friends? Yes

A Suitable Boy by Vikram Seth

I love books that explore, exploit, and analyze culture. I went through a phase in college called my “depressing Asian novels” phase where I was passionately obsessed with (you guessed it) novels about Asian culture. When A Suitable Boy showed up in the mail, my first thought was—wha? this thing is gigantic! My second thought was—I’m going to like this. You see, novels based on culture, have stereotypically similar cover art—much like romance novels feature women with heaving bosoms and heads tilted back, mysteries feature dark figures with guns, and fantasies feature swords, leaves, elves, and the occasional eel/dragon. Cultural novels feature autumn colors—red, brown, orange—with lots of fabric and people looking pensive, sad, or plain depressed. As was the case with the cover of A Suitable Boy.


The story tells the tale of several families (with dozens of characters) who live in post-colonial India (approx. 1952). There are four main families who all play different roles in the explanation of Indian culture. The characters range from politicians and teachers to businessmen and mothers. The overarching storyline is that of a mother and daughter, both of whom are searching for a suitable spouse for the daughter—Lata. The story explores the burdens and advantages to the caste system and arranged marriage. It also discusses in depth, the political conditions and fervor of the time as India struggled to peaceably make the transition to an independent country.

Overall, I very much enjoyed this story. The ending was a little rushed, tired and inconclusive, but had no epilogue (as I recall) so I can’t complain too much. (I always prefer an abrupt, inconclusive ending to an epilogue.) Aside from that; the characters were well developed—some were entertaining, some annoying, and others loveable. Another solid, epic tale.

Favorite passages:

"Ma! said Lata, a little exasperated at the emotional capital her mother insited on making out of every possible circumstance." Pg 3

"Meenakshi and Arun were not really able to afford all this--Billy Irani had independent means--but it seemed intolerable that they, for whom this kind of life was so obviously intended, should be deprived of it by a mere lack of funds." Pg. 69

"Lata nodded. I'm not a mouse or a tigress, she thought, I'm a hedgehog." Pg 156

" Everyone has tragedy, he said. 'But Krishna had joy. The secet of life is to accept. Accept happiness, accept sorrow; accept success, accept failure; accept fame, accept disgrace; accept doubt, even accept the impression of certainty." pg 812

"Don't count your chickens before they're hatched,' said Lata, laughing. 'But they might never get hatched,' said Savita. 'I may as well count them now." pg 954

"Dipankar stepped out of his hut in the garden after having meditated for an hour or so. He had come to a decision about the next step in his life. This decision was irrevocable unless he changed his mind." Pg 1192

"...I too hate long books: the better, the worse. If they're bad, they merely make me pant with the effort of holding them up for a few minutes. But if they're good, I turn into a social moron for days, refusing to go out of my room, scowling and growling at interruptions, ignoring weddings and funerals, and making enemies out of friends. I still bear the scars of Middlemarch." Pg. 1370

If this were a movie, I’d rate it: PG-13 (there’s some violence.)

Overall Grade: A-

Would I recommend this to my friends? Yes, to those who can persevere through 1,488 page books.

The Pillars of the Earth by Ken Follett

Remember in elementary school when your third grade teacher taught you about writing a story and the parts of a plot? You probably saw a diagram that looked something like this:

The diagram, as I see it, for The Pillars of the Earth would look something like this:

Now, I’m not saying that professional writers should stick to an amateur creative method they were taught at age 8, but the deviation from the traditional plot form was so stark in The Pillars of the Earth that I found it particularly annoying. The story went something like this: John was a kid who dreamed of being a concert pianist. John was talented and took music lessons. He practiced and practiced. He found the field was very competitive, but he worked hard and persevered hoping to someday play at Carnegie Hall. Remember John? He once played a gig at Carnegie Hall.

Repeatedly during the novel, Follett would spend hundreds of pages building up to a climax, only to skip the climax and then spend about a sentence talking about how the climax happened. WTF?!

All of that irritation aside, the story itself was quite compelling. It is set in Medeival England with the Builder family. Tom Builder is a mason whose life dream is to build a Cathedral. There’s an antagonist named William who should have been killed on about page 5. I now break for one more criticism. My theory is that Follet wanted desparately for his readers to understand that William was one sick bastard who should be killed. In an effort to make this point, William is painted as a character who is obsessed with raping women. I can deal with a rape scene when it is integral to the storyline, but there must have been close to 10 rape scenes in this book. Was that necessary? I had a pretty damned good idea after rape scene number 1, that William should go to hell. I tolerated rape scene number 2, and thought—okay, I get it—he’s got a sick obsession. The remaining rape scenes were COMPLETELY unecessary. Don’t get it. Don’t want to get it.

Oops, I digress, back to the story. The book talks a lot about building, which I found quite interesting to read about measurements and styles and all of that. Also interesting, was learning about Medeival monastic life (according to Follett). The book contained love, broken hearts, pregnancies (both wanted and unwanted), a witch, marriage, kings, arson, attacks, defense, hope, the absense of hope, times of starvation and times of plenty. It is a great story, long but an easy read.

Favorite passages:
 

"Having faith in God did not mean sitting back and doing nothing. It meant believing that you would find success if you did your best hgonestly and energetically." pg.424


"She loved him because he had brought her back to life. She had been like a caterpillar in a cocoon, and he had drawn her out and shown her that she was a butterfly. She would have spent her entire life numb to the joys and pains of love, if he had not walked into her secret glade, and shared his story peoms with her, and kissed her so lightly, and then slowly, gently, awakened the love that lay dormant in her heart. He had been so patient, so tolerant, despite his youth. For that she would always love him." pg. 799

"Philip smiled. 'Knotty theological questions are the least worrying of problems, to me.' 'Why?' 'Because they will all be resolved in the hereafter, and meanwhile they can safely be shelved." pg. 946

If this were a movie, I’d rate it: R (for language and some pretty detailed sex scenes)

Overall Grade: C+

Would I recommend this to my friends? Yeah, a few--it is an easy read.

Crime and Punishment by Fyodor Dostoevsky

Crime and Punishment is one of those books that was generally enjoyable to read each time I picked it up, but was never compelling enough to keep me awake past my bed-time reading. I actually finished the book a couple of weeks ago, but have been really unsure how I felt about it; therefore the delay in this post.

Crime and Punishment is the story of Rodion Romanovich Raskolnikov; a student who has dropped out of school due to lack of funding. He has studied philosophy in depth and has formulated the theory that certain people have the right to murder (he uses Napoleon as an example). Raskolnikov is destitute and has pawned all of his valuables to a cranky old pawnbroker named Alyona Ivanovna. Raskolnikov formulates a plan to murder Ivanova; his justification being that he could perform acts of kindness with her money, also he needed money for himself, his mother, and sister. Finally, he claims himself to be one of those who are authorized to murder.

After committing the crime, Raskolnikov suffers from a nervous breakdown and the remainder of the story tells of his friends and family, and their confusion over Raskolnikov’s state. Raskolnikov goes back and forth through periods of humility where he feels he must confess and then thinks perhaps he can go on in normal society.

Raskolnikov befriends Sonia, a young prostitute, who ultimately convinces him to confess and pay for his crime (prison in Siberia).

That’s basically how the Russian version of “and they lived happily ever after”.

I did enjoy the story—Raskolnikov’s mental struggles were interesting to ponder. I have to admit that I grew a little tired of them by the end though. The story was pretty predictable possessing few surprises, but overall I liked the story—after all, it is about a crazy person.

Favorite passages:

“What answer had your lecturer in Moscow to make to the question why he was forging notes? ‘Everybody is getting rich one way or another, so I want to make haste to get rich too.’ I don’t remember the exact words, but the upshot was that he wants money for nothing, without waiting or working! We’ve grown used to having everything ready-made, to walking on crutches, to having our food chewed for us.” Pg. 153 (huh, and that was in the mid 1800s...)

“She was an ugly little thing. I really don’t know what drew me to her then—I think it was because she was always ill. If she had been lame or hunchback, I believe I should have liked her better still.” Pg. 232

“…but yet she seems in a way to have liked my brutal frankness. She thought it showed I was unwilling to deceive her if I warned her like this beforehand and for a jealous woman, you know, that’s the first consideration.” Pg. 467

If this were a movie, I’d rate it: R

Overall Grade: C+

Would I recommend this to my friends? Some of them—those who like dark, depressing stories about mental issues.

Persuasion By Jane Austen

Persuasion is another Jane Austen novel. As mentioned previously, I’ve never been able to grasp the intrigue of Jane Austen’s style so take my review with a grain of salt.

The story is about the Elliot family who, while once wealthy, had squandered their inheritance and are left up to their ears in debt. Anne, the story’s main character and daughter of the Elliot family, convinces her widower father that the best solution to their financial woes is for the family to move to Bath and rent out their estate.

They do so and their renters turn out to be none other than the sister and brother-in-law of Anne’s ex-fiancé of 10 years ago. (You see where this is going, right?)

Basically from here on out, this story has all of the elements of every other Jane Austen novel I’ve read. One of the sister’s is kind of crazy, one is annoying, relatives propose to Anne and she refuses. Anne likes a guy who turns out to be a creep. Some people get sick and some become engaged unexpectedly. People fall in love and weddings are planned. It is a fine story but completely predictable and white bread.

If this were a movie, I’d rate it: PG-13

Overall Grade: C

Would I recommend this to my friends? Some of them.

Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy

Anna Karenina was a beautiful, complex story. True to the style of 19th century Russian literature, the story contains countless characters but the main focus is on four people and their relationships—Anna Karenina, Vronsky, Kitty and Levin.


The story contrasts the experiences had by two different couples—one of which ends with joy and edification and the other ends in tragedy and misery. I thoroughly enjoyed the story but also found it incredibly heart wrenching. I finished this book about a week ago but it has weighed heavily on me and I haven’t been able to write a proper synopsis. I still find myself unable to do so, so I’m going to steal a review from Esther Lombardi. Here you go:

"When Tolstoy finally started the story of Anna Karenina, his wife reported in a letter to her sister, "Yesterday Leo suddenly started to write a novel on contemporary life. The subject is the unfaithful wife and all the ensuing tragedy.'

So, Tolstoy creates the character of Anna Karenina, a young woman who finds herself in a loveless marriage with Karenin. It might not have seemed so intolerable if she had not met and fallen in love with Count Vronsky.

As a comparison to Anna's tragic affair, we hear about the relationship between Kitty and Levin, a conjugal love match. Levin is first rejected by Kitty, since she has her heart set on Count Vronsky. Since Vronsky's affections are already taken by Anna Karenina, Kitty's heart is broken and she eventually turns back to Levin for love and marriage.

In the character of Anna, Tolstoy creates a woman who is perhaps most unhappily destined for tragedy. Anna falls in love with Count Vronsky, only to find that her passions are uncontrollable. She might have continued the relationship in secret, but she defies the 'rules,' and is forced to pay the ultimate price... She loses all contact with her son; and she is shunned from proper society.”


Favorite passages (there are several):

"You think war is necessay? Fine. Send anyone who preaches war to a special front-line legion--into the assault, into the attack, ahead of everyone!" Pg 808

"And it now seemed to him that there was not a single belief of the Chuch that violated the main thing--faith in God, in the good, as the sole purpose of man." Pg 799

"The conversation had begun nicely, but precisely because it was much too nice, it stopped again. They had to resort to that sure, never failing remedy--malicious gossip." pg 134

"Be bad, but at least don't be a liar." pg 235

"The role of a man who attached himself to a married woman and devoted his life to involving her in adultery at all costs, had something beautiful and grand about it and could never be ridiculous." pg 128

"Stepan Arkadyich smiled. He knew so well this feeling of Levin's, knew that for him all the girls in the world were divided into two sorts: one sort was all the girls in the world except her, and these girls had all human weaknesses and were very ordinary girls; the other sort was her alone, with no weaknesses and higher than everything human." pg 37

If this were a movie, I’d rate it: R

Overall Grade: A

Would I recommend this to my friends? Yes

Double Act by Jacqueline Wilson

Yesterday’s read was Double Act; also by Jacqueline Wilson. It was about a set of 10 year old twins who do everything together, think alike, creep people out by saying the same thing at the same time, and can’t imagine life apart.


Their names are Ruby and Garnet. Their dad buys a bookshop in a small town and his girlfriend, Rose, moves with them. The twins, of course, hate Rose as she has taken their dad’s attention and they miss their mother (who died).

Ultimately, Garnet is offered a full ride scholarship at a prestigious boarding school while Ruby is not and Garnet decides to take the opportunity. Ruby stops talking to Garnet and the twins endure a summer of silence.

At the end everyone makes up, they decide that Rose is okay, and life goes one.

This book, like The Story of Tracy Beaker, is told through journals written by the girls. I enjoyed it more than Tracy Beaker—mostly because Garnet’s character was likeable. Ruby was much like Tracy Beaker—loud, obnoxious, mean—basically a bully. This was a cute story. Nothing more, nothing less.

If this were a movie, I'd rate it: PG

Overall Grade: C.

Would I recommend this book to my friends: Yeah, I’d recommend it to parents of girls age 8-10.

The Story of Tracy Beaker by Jacqueline Wilson

Uuuuggggghhhh. Yes, I confess, I went into this book with a bad attitude. It all started when I read the back cover which states “Tracy’s been in foster care as long as she can remember. Maybe one day her mother will show up and together they’ll have fabulous adventures. Then again, maybe she won’t. In the meantime, Tracy’s doing everything she can to take care of herself. And that’s hard work, because the girls she lives with are mean and rude and horrible.”


I just…well, Tracy was really annoying and bratty and that wore on me. Fortunately it only had to wear on me for approximately 2 hours and then the book was over.

From what I can tell, Tracy Beaker became a big hit in Britain in the early 90’s. She’s kind of like Punky Brewster…only not as cute and without the cool socks.

The story is 10 year old Tracy Beaker’s journal written in first person narrative while she is living in a foster home. I’m sure kids are all over this stuff, but I just didn’t get it. Maybe I’m getting old.

If this were a movie, I'd rate it: PG

Overall Grade: Meh.

Would I recommend this book to my friends: No. Not even my friends' kids. Sorry.

Bleak House by Charles Dickens

I have one bit of advice for anyone planning to read Bleak House. If your copy does not contain a character list, create your own as you read. I personally got about a third of the way through and realized I was getting characters confused, at which point I promptly logged on to Cliff’s Notes and downloaded a character list which much to my chagrin contained three spoilers. Way to go.

I’ve read several reviews stating that Bleak House is a slow read. I don’t necessarily agree with this statement, so don’t let such reviews frighten you off. It isn’t a riveting read, but isn’t too tedious—much more exciting than the middle section of War and Peace.

The following are (in my most humble opinion) the most major characters in the book, I would name the other major and minor characters but you would be bored to tears by the time I was through as there were so many.

The story begins with Sir Leicester Dedlock, and his beautiful and much younger wife. She has a secret that she has never divulged to anyone, not ever her husband. It is so secret, in fact, that even she does not know it in its entirety. We are then introduced to Esther Summerson, Ada Clare, and Richard Carstone who are wards of Mr. Jarndyce—a generous, kind fatherly character who is involved in a never ending, complicated and expensive lawsuit. The wards move into Mr. Jarndyce’s estate—Bleak House. The house is anything but bleak and is a place of solace for the three wards.
The story in all of its intricacies plays in out and through the aforementioned characters as they experience life. Their experiences include travels, love, heartbreak, obsession, sickness, murder, spontaneous combustion, death, trickery (or trickeration if I was an ESPN commentator), education, revenge forgiveness, and much more.

Favorite Quotes:
"Sir Leicester is generally in a complacent state, and rarely bored. When he has nothing else to do, he can always conetmplate his own greatness. It is a considerable advantage to a man, to have so inexhaustible a subject." (pg 167)
"He didn't at all see why the busy Bee should be proposed as a model to him; he supposed the Bee liked to make honey, or he wouldn't do it--nobody asked him." (pg 106)

If this were a movie, I'd rate it: PG-13

Overall Grade: A-
Would I recommend this book to my friends: Yes.

Mort by Terry Pratchett

Mort was my favorite Terry Pratchett book on the top 100 list. I’ve now completed all 5 Terry Pratchetts on the list and more exciting than that is the fact that Mort was my 50th read on the list. (For those of you who failed 2nd grade, that means I'm halfway done!) Now, I’m just hoping that the second half of the list will take less time to read than did the first half (28 years).


This story (like The colour of Magic, Night Watch and Guards! Guards!) takes place on Discworld—the planet that travels through space on the back of a giant turtle. The main character’s name is Mortimer (Mort for short) and is regularaly referred to by others as “boy” due to his lack of skills, non-descript characteristics, and minimal self confidence. After failing to be chosen by any of the employers at the job fair for an apprenticeship, Death (yes THE Death) hires Mort to be his apprentice.

As the story develops, so does Mort. He learns through challenges and failures as he plays the role of Death; meanwhile navigating a relationship with Death’s adopted daughter. The story is very amusing, easy to read and the plot is clever and unique.

Favorite Quotes:

“The creator had a lot of remarkably good ideas when he put the world together, but making it understandable hadn’t been one of them.” (pg 5)

“Mort hesitated. He wanted to say: you’re wrong, he’s [Death's] not like that at all, he doesn’t care if people are good or bad so long as they’re punctual. And kind to cats, he added.” (pg 70)

If this were a movie, I'd rate it: PG-13

Overall Grade: B

Would I recommend this book to my friends: Yes…except for my friends who are Twilight series junkies.

Treasure Island by Robert Louis Stevenson

There was a page in the back of my copy of A Tale of Two Cities which read: “By the year 2000, 2 out of 3 Americans could be illiterate”. This ad was put together by the Ad Council in (I believe) 1989. I scoffed at the ad, but it made me wonder—what exactly does it mean to be illiterate? I don’t know for sure. I started reading Treasure Island—which I read once before in fourth grade. I distinctly remember understanding almost nothing my first time through; which is why it ended up on my “to read” list. This recollection made me curious. According to the introduction, Treasure Island was written in 1895 and is “aimed at a young and chiefly male readership.” I don’t know exactly how old “young” is but I’ll assume 10-13ish. This leads me to conclude that a) because the book was written for boys, I, as a 10 year old girl wasn’t able to understand it by virtue of the fact that I was a girl, b) I was illiterate, or c) I thought it was just easier to skim the book and use cliffs notes instead.

Well, even if I was illiterate at age 10, I’ve redeemed myself by comprehending Treasure Island much better this time through. It was only 190 pages and therefore made for a quick, two day read. I think I had the story mixed up with Robinson Crusoe and kept waiting for the sweet natural water slide and the treetop resort and was disappointed when I realized they weren’t coming. Aside from that, it was an action packed pirate story in which the young boy managed to commandeer a ship from pirates—so, as you can tell—it was very realistic.

Okay, I’ll stop with the mockery. In all seriousness, it was a cute story, well written, intriguing, and fun to read.

Oh, here’s a piece of trivia for you. You know the famous pirate Long John Silver? He originated in Treasure Island.

If this were a movie, I'd rate it: PG.

Overall Grade: B-

Would I recommend this book to my friends: I’d recommend it to parents who want something to read to their kids.

A Tale of Two Cities by Charles Dickens

A Tale of Two Cities was another great Dickens read. As it turns out, not only do I not hate Dickens, but I think I actually really like him. There. I said it.

A small bit of trivia for those who don’t want to read A Tale of Two Cities—the two cities to which the title refers are London and Paris. The story takes place in the late 18th century and seems somewhat historical in nature. Unfortunately, I don’t know how much of it refers to “true” history and what is fiction. Maybe someone can help me out there (Matt?...).

While overall the book was very well written and understandable, one thing is bugging me. Dickens, numerous times throughout the story, wrote paragraphs which were a string of sentences each beginning with the word “that” each of which seemed (to me) inconclusive.

I personally, might write a sentence beginning with “that” as follows. That the orange had long passed its prime, was obvious.

Dickens’ “that” sentences were more like this:

That the yellow bee had last week gathered nectar from the flower. That the hummingbird danced lightly on the planter, green feathers shining in the sunlight. That certain people are wrong in the majority of their opinions but insist on spouting garbage as if it is fact.

I simply don’t understand. These sentences leave me feeling as if I’ve accidentally stepped off the curb into traffic and can’t gain balance in order to retreat.

I assume the seemingly incomplete “that” sentences were grammatically acceptable during Dickens’ time but I’m going to need some explanation. Maybe my second grade teacher forgot to teach me about those.

I digress.

The story is a mysterious historical adventure drama about a man (Dr. Manette) who is imprisoned unjustly; his daughter (Lucie Manette), her husband (wouldn’t you like to know?), their banker (Mr. Lorry), and the hero (not telling). I’m leaving out a bunch of other characters including villains…because they’re jerks. I’ve decided not to expand much on the plot as the story is written such that the reader has little idea about what is going on until pieces unfold throughout. It is a great story. I’ll leave it at that.

Favorite Quotes:”When he cared to talk, he talked well; but, the cloud of caring for nothing, which overshadowed him with such a fatal darkness, was very rarely pierced by the light within him.” (pg. 136)

“All the women knitted. They knitted worthless things…” (pg. 171)

“A solitary old bachelor,’ answered Mr. Lorry, shaking his head. ‘There is nobody to weep for me.” (pg. 288)

If this were a movie, I'd rate it: You could easily make it PG-13 or R.

Overall Grade: A-

Would I recommend this book to my friends: Totally.

Great Expectations by Charles Dickens

Today is kind of like the day that my husband realized he's not a Republican. Today, I no longer can honestly say “ugh, I hate Dickens”. Just goes to show that when you’re 15, you’re not always right. Fancy that. Great Expectations was a GREAT read. It was intense, humorous, Dickens didn’t wax too verbose, it contained both creepy, crazy characters, and also those who were sweet and likeable. I kept waiting for the book to suck, but it never did.

The story is about “Pip” who was a young orphan, raised by his aunt and her husband. His uncle is raising him to be a blacksmith but Pip is a boy of “great expectations” who, upon meeting the beautiful and wealthy Estella, and her guardian Miss Havisham, he thirsts for his own wealth. For Pip, the grass is always greener somewhere else. He mysteriously stumbles into a fortune of an unknown size and still finds no happiness in his station, as he loves Estella who refuses to love him in return. The story continues and gains intensity as Pip unexpectedly runs into an old acquaintance who surprises him and once again the course of his life is changed.

My biggest disappointment was the ending—not so much because of what happened, but because the final third (or so) of the book was so intense and compelling and I felt like it came to a screeching halt and the end felt abbreviated. Everything was resolved and the story concluded, but it just felt incomplete to me. The edition I read also contained the original ending; which I read with hopes that it would be more definitive, but it was even less appealing to me. Am I the only one who thought "huh? that's it?" at the end?

Favorite Quotes:
"We Britons had at that time particularly settled that it was treasonable to doubt our having and our being the best of everything: otherwise, while I was scared by the immensity of London, I think I might have had some faint doubts whether it was not rather ugly, crooked, narrow and dirty." (pg 162)

"As to forming any plan for the future, I could as soon have formed an elephant." (pg 325)

"It was one of those March days when the sun shines hot and the wind blows cold: when it is summer in the light, and winter in the shade." (pg 429)
If this were a movie, I'd rate it: PG-13

Overall Grade: A- (I think that’s fairly accurate, but I may be biased based on the fact that I had such low expectations going into the book.)

Would I recommend this book to my friends: Yes.

Night Watch by Terry Pratchett

This was my favorite Terry Pratchett so far. The main character was Sam Vimes—to whom I was introduced while reading Guards! Guards!. He was the watch captain in that book. Vimes played a slightly different roll in the majority of this book as he travels back in time 30 years after falling through the ceiling of the Ankh-Morpork library (known to be enchanted). He lives a dual reality in this earlier and darker Ankh-Morpork as he plays the role of John Keel—the boss of the young, rookie copper—Sam Vimes. Vimes, as John Keel leads a rebellion against the corrupt government of Ankh-Morpork while trying to find out how to return to the future where his wife is in labor with their first child.


Night Watch was an intriguing, intense, energetic and entertaining read. I normally view time travel as a cop-out for lack of creativity, but it was very well played in this book. The story had a far more somber tone than some of Pratchett’s other works, but humor interposed.

Favorite Quotes:
“Oh dear, here we go again, thought Vimes. Why did I wait until I was married to become strangely attractive to powerful women? Why didn’t it happen to me when I was sixteen? I could have done with it then.” (pg 214)

“…Vimes found it better to look to Authority for orders and then filter those orders through a fine mesh of common sense, adding a generous scoop of creative misunderstanding and maybe even incipient deafness if circumstances demanded, because Authority rarely descended to street level.” (pg 65)

If this were a movie, I'd rate it: PG-13

Overall Grade: B

Would I recommend this book to my friends: Yes.

The Color of Magic by Terry Pratchett

To be completely honest, had I read this book in Spanish, I probably would have comprehended about as much as I did in English. (I probably only know about 100 Spanish words.)


Here’s what I understood. The story is about a guy named Rincewind, an almost wizard (he flunked out of school), and his travels with Twoflower—a guy from another planet. Oh, and when I say another planet, I don’t mean—a planet besides Earth. What I mean is—a planet besides Discworld. Discworld is the flat circular planet which rides around space on the back of the Great A’Tuin—a turtle—and the planet where Terry Pratchett’s Discworld series is set. (Fancy that.)

Twoflower and Rincewind get themselves into some trouble and are manhandled around the planet for a while until they end up in Krall. Krall is significant, but I’m not sure how. I was drifting in an out of sleep during the last pages of the book, so I won’t spoil the ending for you…mostly because they are a bit foggy.

Something can be said about a 200 page book that takes me three weeks to read. I’m not sure can be said, but it says something. I wanted to like it; really I did. The combination of fantasy and Britishness was just too much for my puny little brain to handle.

Favorite Quotes: “In an instant he became aware that the tourist was about to try his own peculiar brand of linguistics, which meant that he would speak loudly and slowly in his own language.” (pg 196)

“Some pirates achieved immortality by great deeds of cruelty or derring-do. Some achieved immortality by amassing great wealth. But the captain had long ago decided that he would, on the whole, prefer to achieve immortality by not dying.” (pg 161)

If this were a movie, I'd rate it: PG…I think (I might have missed some stuff)

Overall Grade: it wouldn’t be fair for me to rate it.

Would I recommend this book to my friends: Yeah, I’d recommend it to my friends who like fantasy.

Guards! Guards! by Terry Pratchett

This book is the 8th book in Terry Pratchett's Discworld series--which is a humor/fantasy series about a flat world which rides through space on the back of a turtle.

I'm going to steal the next two paragraphs from Wikipedia because frankly, I’m not all that great at writing book reports (not particularly revelatory to anyone who reads this blog).

“The story follows a plot by a secret brotherhood, the Unique and Supreme Lodge of the Elucidated Brethren of the Ebony Night, to overthrow the Patrician of Ankh-Morpork and install a puppet king, under the control of the Supreme Grand Master (Vetinari's secretary, Lupine Wonse). Using a stolen magic book, they summon a dragon to strike fear into the people of Ankh-Morpork.


Once a suitable state of terror and panic has been created, the Supreme Grand Master proposes to put forth an "heir" to the throne, who will slay the dragon and rid the city of tyranny. It is the task of the Night Watch – Captain Vimes, Sergeant Colon, Corporal Nobbs, and new volunteer Carrot Ironfoundersson – to stop them, with some help from the Librarian of the Unseen University, an orangutan trying to get the stolen book back.”

Guards! Guards! was very hilarious in a very British way. I’m not incredibly well versed in the art of understanding British humor, but I did find that reading this book with a British accent and imagining Monty Python-esque situations seemed to increase my appreciation of the story significantly. I guess that’s about all I’ve got on this one.

Favorite Quotes: "Aiding and Abetting what, Captain?' said Carrot, as the weaponless guards trooped away. "You have to aid and abet something.' 'I think in this case it will just be generalized abetting,' said Vimes. 'Persistent and reckless abetment." (pg 329)

"They felt, in fact, tremendously bucked-up...which was definitely several letters of the alphabet away from how they normally felt." (pg 157)
If this were a movie, I'd rate it: PG-13

Overall Grade: B

Would I recommend this book to my friends: Yes, the kind of dorky ones.(and I mean "dorky" with the highest possible level of respect.)

On the Road by Jack Kerouac

On the Road is a story about the carefree, irresponsible, nomadic life that sometimes I wish I would have led when I was 20 instead of going to college.

Jack Kerouac tells the story of his adventures hitchhiking, driving (cars owned and stolen), riding trains, and walking across the country (also to Mexico) multiple times over a several year period. He travels with several friends, (some famous as I understand it) the most continuous of whom is Neal—Jack’s loony addict friend who is addicted to sex, drugs, getting married and stealing. Neal simply can’t figure life out but makes traveling a real adventure for Jack and all those who stumble in and out of the story.

The edition of On the Road I read was “The Original Scroll” which was the author’s first draft. It varies from later editions in several ways. The original draft contains the “real” names of the people in the stories and also was written on a literal scroll. It was written in one big three hundred page long paragraph. Whether that’s because Jack didn’t know how to mark a new paragraph on a typewriter or whether he just didn’t care (which seems more likely) I don’t know. The lack of punctuation made the book tough to follow, fragmented, and rough, but was a very interesting read.

Fittingly, the book came to a halt mid-sentence. Apparently, there’s a note at the end of the scroll which reads “DOG ATE”. This edition does slap a fabricated (from the 1957 edition) ending in as an appendix so that readers aren’t left hanging. The ending gave me some insight into what the “real” book reads like as it has a completely different feel from the rough draft which was more artistically written and better developed. All in all, however, I’m glad I read the rough draft, as it was very organic and likely more true to reality than was the revised version. This was an enjoyable read—although devoid of plot twists or any real intensity—but it was a leisurely and entertaining story.

Favorite Quotes: "This is the Story of America. Everybody's doing what they think they're supposed to do." (pg 170)

"I have finally taught Neal that he can do anything he wants, become mayor of Denver, marry a millionairess or become the greatest poet since Rimbaud. But he keeps rushing out to see the midget auto races." (pg 145)

"Somebody had tipped the American continent like a pinball machine and all the goofballs had come rolling to LA in the southwest corner." (pg 206)

If this were a movie, I'd rate it: R...or NC-17 depending on how you chose to make it.

Overall Grade: B-

Would I recommend this book to my friends: Yes.

The Count of Monte Cristo by Alexander Dumas

I’ll be honest. I have a sort of overarching paranoiac fear associated with books that are a) “old” and b) long. This probably originated with my very drawn out and painful reading of David Copperfield in the 9th grade. The Count of Monte Cristo is one of “those”—old and long books which I approached with hesitation and fear. Fortunately my fear was completely unfounded. The Count of Monte Cristo is anything but painful, drawn out and/or boring. This is a quick, intense, easy read. Dumas’ writing style is action packed and devoid of unnecessary details.

You’ve probably seen the movie and therefore have a general grasp on the plot of this book. (Although, let me tell you, while I loved the movie, it BUTCHERED this book.) For those who aren’t familiar with the plot: the main character, Edmond Dantes, is a young, happy sailor who is engaged to a beautiful woman, and is in love. His life is turned upside down when he is wrongfully accused of treason. He is imprisoned in the Chateau d’If; after which, he seeks revenge on those who wronged him. Okay, so Edmond Dantes isn’t exactly a great role model, but the story is awesome nonetheless.

Favorite Quotes: “Live and be happy, beloved children of my heart, and never forget that, until the day comes when God will deign to reveal the future to man, all human wisdom is contained in these words: Wait and hope!”.

If this were a movie, I'd rate it: PG-13

Overall Grade: A-

Would I recommend this book to my friends: Yes, absolutely.

Alice in Wonderland by Lewis Carroll

I decided to read Alice's Adventures in Wonderland (AAW) now since the new movie will be coming out shortly and I wanted to read the book before I saw the movie. Generally, I don't enjoy going to movie theatres, but for a Tim Burton movie with Johnny Depp, I'll make an exception.

AAW is only 118 pages long (in the edition I read) so it is one of those books where the movie really tells the entire story. Actually, it tells the entire story plus some. For example--Tweedledee and Tweedledum and Humpty Dumpty aren't even in AAW; They are characters in the sequel--Through the Looking Glass.

I learned in the introduction that there was an edition of AAW released in 1999 called Annotated Alice. This edition includes footnotes explaining insight that Victorian readers would have understood but that are lost on modern readers. I wish I would have picked up Annotated Alice.  I think it would make the story far more insightful and amusing. What makes AAW entertaining is the plays on words, the quirky characters and plot, and the random, dreamlike feel of the entire book.

The most interesting thing I learned was in the introduction and was the following. Lewis Carroll had a strong affinity for photographing young girls nude. He apparently had an innocent obsession with children--especially female children. He was friends with a family--one of the daughters was named Alice and he was in love with her. He told her the story of Alice in Wonderland (originally titled Alice's Adventures Underground) and later wrote it down for her. He supposedly mentioned the possibility to Alice's parents of his marrying her someday at which point Alice's parents promptly severed ties with Lewis. Curious.

Favorite Quotes: I don't have a favorite quote, but I enjoyed the section about the Mock Turtle and the Gryphon.

If this were a movie, I'd rate it: G

Overall Grade: B-

Would I recommend this book to my friends: Yep.

I Capture the Castle by Dodie Smith

I Capture the Castle was a really delightful story of 17 year old girl—Cassandra Mortmain—growing up in 1930s England. She and her family live in abject poverty in an old run down English castle. Her father is a famous author, who has experienced a decade of writers block sparked by a year of imprisonment (the background of which was rather humorous). The result is that the only people in the Mortmain household capable of earning any income are Stephen, an orphan who helps out around the house, and Topaz, the eccentric step-mom who earns money by modeling for paintings. Cassandra is the narrator of the book via her journals; which she started keeping in order to practice speedwriting.

When two young American men, Simon and Neil Cotton, arrive at the castle, the Mortmains lives change drastically. They bring inspiration, financial assistance, love, food and entertainment to the Mortmains and ultimately provide Cassandra with tons of material for her journals.

I kept getting lost when reading I Capture the Castle as the author doesn’t do much by the way of putting the story in historical context. My recent readings have been set during the late 19th century, while I Capture the Castle is set during the mid 20th century. It was interesting to note the various social changes that occurred between the 19th and 20th centuries.

This was a funny, clever, amusing, easy read. The characters were well defined and easy to love (or hate). The story was suspenseful, but not too much, and heart-wrenching in places, but not to bring you to tears.

Favorite Quotes: "In the end, Miss Marcy took the middle pages out of her library record, which gave us a pleasant feeling that we were stealing from the government..." (15)

"And no bathroom on earth will make up for marrying a bearded man you hate." (130)

"I DO NOT ENVY ROSE. When I imagine changing places with her I get the feeling I do on finishing a novel with a brick-wall happy ending--I mean the kind of ending when you never think any more about the characters..." (197)

If this were a movie, I'd rate it: PG-13.

Overall Grade: B

Would I recommend this book to my friends: Some of them--the less intellectually driven ones, or those who want a good, quick, vacation read.

Tess of the d'Urbervilles by Thomas Hardy

Upon closing the back cover of Tess of the d'Urbervilles (which will be abreviated TdU moving forward), my husband looked over and asked "what did you think?" to which I replied "I loved this book. Yeah, I loved it."

When my brother was home over Christmas and I was reading Emma, he and I were discussing our distaste for Jane Austen novels and one complaint that surfaced was that her stories typically focus on people and their high class problems. ("High class problems" is a phrase our family uses if someone is stressed out about where to go on vacation or what to wear to the ball, etc.) Part of what I loved about TdU is that this story is not about high class problems, in fact, quite the opposite. Also, I loved this book because it is another story about crazy people in love (which, as mentioned previously on this blog, I enjoy.) Finally, I thouroughly enjoyed Thomas Hardy's writing style. It was artistic, expressive and detailed without excessive verbosity.

TdU gained a lot of attention (some positive, some negative) in its day because it was daring--it questioned social order, destiny, values, and religion. Most importantly, the book is based on a "true" story which in today's society would be, for the most part, commonplace but would have been kept intenesely secret in the 1800s.

TdU is a story of Tess Durbeyfield, who was the oldest daughter of an impoverished, drunk beggar and a milkmaid. The book chronicles her life and her struggles as a poor woman in rural England.

Favorite Quote: I have three--I couldn't pick one. 1) "the magnitude of lives is not as to their extrenal displacements, but as to their subjective experiences. The impressionable peasant leads a larger, fuller, more dramatic life than the pachydermatous king." 2) "It was for herself that he loved Tess; her soul, her heart, her substance--not for her skill in the dairy..." 3) "This was always how Clare settled practical questions; by a sentiment which had nothing to do with them."

If this were a movie, I'd rate it: PG-13.

Overall Grade: A

Would I recommend this book to my friends: Absolutely...although, not to the ones who demand "happily ever after" endings.